Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?
Last Updated: 24.06.2025 08:34
This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.
Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.
It’s still here.
SpaceX adds 26 satellites to its Starlink constellation with launch from California - Space
For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.
Be who you already are.
You are like me, then.
What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.
You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.
I was tired of fighting.
What are women's true thoughts and feelings on bestiality?
It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.
It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.
I was tired of trying and failing.
6 "Bad" Fruits You Should Be Eating for Weight Loss, According to Dietitians - EatingWell
So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.
It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.
What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.
Trump administration eyes stripping Columbia's accreditation - BBC
But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.
So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”
The sadness was still there.
SpaceX launches Falcon 9 from Vandenberg SFB Saturday afternoon - KSBY News
Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.
When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.
It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.
1-In-100,000 Chance Earth Could Be Yeeted Out Of The Solar System By A Passing Star - IFLScience
Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.
But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.
And the sadness?
Would the word literate carry the same meaning with public (common wealth) in 1900 vs today 2020?
It’s here now, writing to you.
Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.
I had run out of hope.
Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.
In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.